Almost a Witch
by MKwitch
Summary: Although there has been a female wizard on the Discworld before, there has never been a male witch. Until now...
1. Chapter 1

Books can distort time and space. Not all books do, but they have the ability to. All they need are the right words, in the right time and place. This was why, when Albus Dumbledore forgot to right a proper letter when dropping off Harry Potter at his relative's house, and he hastily scribbled a note instead, it not only changed that world, but another one, too.

The note apparently had just the right wording, and was in just the right spot, that a few seconds after everyone had left, time and space were distorted. Both the note and the small child went tumbling into L-space.

L-space is another dimension that is entirely comprised of books. It's not just all the books that have been written, either. It is also all the books that will be writer, or could have been written, and even some that were written in an alternate universe. This can get quite confusing, so only Senior Librarians are allowed there. Unfortunately, there were no librarians of any sort to spot the sleeping baby that briefly appeared, along with a small piece of paper, then disappeared again just as quickly.

XxXxX

Meanwhile, in a completely different dimension, a young woman, a witch in fact, sat at a table trying to compose a letter. Miss Tiffany Aching, witch of the Chalk, was writing to Eskarina Smith of Ankh Morpork. They had been corresponding for several years now, after that whole incident with the Cunning Man, and were writing to each other every several months.

Just as Tiffany was about to put her pencil down to the paper, it suddenly disappeared. It was immediately replaced by a sleeping child who looked to be just over a year old, and a small piece of paper that seemed to be made of an odd material.

Being a witch, Tiffany did not scream and panic, but did make a sort of startled gasp. After all, it is not every day that a blank piece of paper spontaneously turns into a baby, even if you were a witch.

Tiffany had grown up on a farm, and so she did know where babies came from, and they did most certainly not come from paper! After checking to make sure that the baby was okay, Tiffany decided to read the note. It read:

_Dear Mrs. Dursley, _

_Your sister has recently died at the hands of Lord Voldemort, and now there is no one to look after Harry. We would be very grateful if you would, since it would be safer for him to stay away from the Wizarding World in general. Thank you in advance. _

_Albus Dumbledore_

After re-reading the note a few times just to make sure, Tiffany became aware of several facts. The first was that this boy, Harry, had just had his parents murdered, and was then left for someone else to pick up. The second fact was that these can not have been the wizards of Unseen University, since they probably never would have found the child in the first place, most of them not even being able to find their back-side with their hands. And the third fact was that there was a small, homeless child now sitting on Tiffany's kitchen table, and there was really no choice there at all. Tiffany Aching now had a son.

Of course, a few details had to be cleared up first, the largest one being that Tiffany had to find out where this boy came from. So after cleaning him up a bit, changing him and feeding him, Tiffany wrapped up Harry in the warmest blanket she could find, and she took her broomstick and headed over to Granny Weatherwax's cottage.

When Tiffany finally came home, it was very late at night. She had told Granny Weatherwax of her suspicions that Harry was from another dimension, which had gotten her a "You've been hanging around that Smith girl too much", which was Granny's way of saying that she didn't really know much about that sort of thing.

This led to both of them flying over to Nanny Ogg's house to see if she had any ideas. When Nanny Ogg didn't know anything about it either, all three of them flew over to another witch's house, who sounded like she might have better luck. Five witches later, and all Tiffany got was that alternate dimensions are very complicated, and things like that were best left to the wizards.

But Tiffany did not want to go to the wizards, partly because they might want to raise Harry themselves, but mostly because they just ignored most women. Tiffany decided that it was better if she just got some rest, and she would try again in the morning.


	2. Chapter 2

When Tiffany woke up the next morning, the solution to her predicament was quite clear. Eskarina Smith would definitely know quite a lot about alternate dimensions, and could probably tell Tiffany something about the one that Harry came from.

After posting the letter, Tiffany was a bit uncertain about how to go about her daily rounds of the Chalk with a baby. Eventually, she managed to rig up something like a booster seat to her broomstick and simply towed Harry along on it.

The days passed quickly, with Tiffany being very busy with her usual witch business as well as taking care of a small child. After about two weeks, though, Eskarina's reply to the letter arrived in the mail. She apparently had visited that particular dimension before, and was more than willing to impart her information on the matter.

The basic gist of it was that there was a very bad man there that wanted Harry dead, and Harry was some kind of Chosen One. Eskarina also said that although the wizards there were very good at magic, they weren't the sort of people that should be trusted to raise children. The letter also went on for a while about various theories about dimensions, and Eskarina's latest research, but Tiffany mainly ignored all of that because that was what most of her letters looked like.

XxX

Soon, life began to take on a routine. Harry followed around Tiffany on her broomstick, and played with the Nac Mac Feegles when he got the chance. Whenever Tiffany went to visit Preston in Ankh Morpork, Harry would be taken to Unseen University to learn how to use his magic.

About nine years passed in this manner, with no horrible monsters to interrupt it. Tiffany and Eskarina still wrote to each other, and much information was exchanged about the dimension that was soon found out to be Roundworld. It was not quite as magic-less as Ponder had originally thought it to be.

After several incidents at the University, the wizards there soon determined that Harry was really, really bad at magic. Horrible, even. Harry still went to the University anyways, because he liked it there, and Mr. Stibbons let him play games on Hex, and mostly because no little boy wants to see their Mum getting romantic with anyone, even a very smart doctor-in-training like Preston.

This routine continued until Harry was about eleven years old. Just after the day when Tiffany had guessed when Harry's birthday was, a very strange letter was delivered to them...

_Author's Note: So sorry to leave this for so long! I meant to write some more on vacation, but was distracted by the sheer awesomeness of Disneyworld. I'll try harder to get more updates sooner, but I can't guarantee it, mainly because I'm just making up the plot as I go along. _


End file.
